March Horoscope

Kenzie Kidman, Writer

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Aries: You should really stop procrastinating all the time…but you can work on that later.

Taurus: Follow your dreams…or maybe follow a rainbow; you have more chances getting a pot of gold.

Gemini: Whatever you do don’t trust the leprechaun; he never makes fair deals.

Cancer: Grab a pint of chocolate milk (because you can’t drink till you’re 21 and chocolate milk is way better), kick your feet up and relax; you deserve it.

Leo: You should watch more Netflix, unless you’re failing your classes or have homework; you should probably do that first.

Virgo: Just remember flowers can’t bloom without a little rain.

Libra: If you aren’t planning on “borrowing” the Declaration of Independence to solve the riddle and get the treasure, then what are you doing with your life? Clearly you need this horoscope to point you back in the right direction. (For the people who know what movie I’m talking about, you have a good taste in entertainment.)

Scorpio: Go look for a four leaf clover…you will find one…eventually…probably.

Sagittarius: 2nd tri is over and 3rd tri is beginning. Take this opportunity to start over and try to do better, and if you already are perfect, well I can’t relate and I guess just keep doing what you’re doing, whatever that is.

Capricorn: Go eat some of those chocolate coins…just don’t eat too many or you might get diabetes. But you do you, honey, you do you.

Aquarius: Remember if one way doesn’t work, there are 100 other ways you can try…or if you, are like me you could always give up and then have a mental breakdown about it later.

Pisces: Umm whatever you do, just avoid the…wait never mind I forgot…I mean it couldn’t have been too important…could it? You’ll be fine…probably.

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